Valentine’s Day is less than a week away and some of you are probably still trying to figure out what to do for you loved ones. Don’t be ashamed, there are thousands of people in your shoes, and don’t panic because I am here to help. So to plan a perfect Valentine’s Day and not break the bank here is what you do…

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Guys

So I was reading a magazine and they gave a list of the top 20 cities of where to find a man. The list wasn’t surprising but I’m pretty sure all of you are going to say “WHERE ARE THEY?” That’s what I said when I saw a few places on the list lol, but if you live in any of the cities below, you have the largest selection of available men…If your city is not listed maybe it is time to relocate…

1. Seattle, WA

2. Denver, CO (Carmelo is with LaLa I am not moving)

3. San Jose, CA

4. San Diego, CA

5. Austin, TX

6. San Francisco, CA (If you want a Danny Tanner-Full  House)

7. Minneapolis, MN

8. Dallas, TX

9. Atlanta, GA (I will leave this one alone…smh)

10. Portland, OR (Great for hiking)

11. Houston, TX

12. Las Vegas, NV (Leave the Elvis impersonators alone)

13. Los Angeles, CA (If you like Kobe, I guess)

14. Boston, MA

15. Chicago, IL

16. New York, NY (They must be hiding)

17. Miami, FL (Ok all of you T-Pain and Flo Rida lovers out there)

18. Columbus, OH (Bow Wow?)

19. Virginia Beach, VA

20. Milwaukee, WI

I  recently received a request from an HGB reader (Sam) on finding an outfit for a first date. She gave me a few ideas of what she wanted. First she considered a dress or skirt with some kind of print that showed her femininity. Here is the first look I created on polyvore:

Grey SkiesFashion Trends & Styles - Polyvore

Grey Skies by Her Goody Bag featuring Fendi shoes

I love the print of this skirt. It makes a bold statement, and the simple tank is the perfect compliment and definitely feminine.

The second look she was considering was some type of jumpsuit or romper that was more edgy and sexy…here is the look:

A Touch of GoldFashion Trends & Styles - Polyvore

A Touch of Gold by Her Goody Bag featuring Steve Madden shoes

I love the silky romper! This look is definitely edgy and sexy. Sometimes people mistake sexy for sleezy, but this look definitely shows the difference.

So Sam, I hope these looks help you make your decision.

Which look should she pick? Feminine or Edgy?

Have a special request? Send it to Janique@hergoodybag.com 

Yesterday someone retweeted a post from blogger Blogxilla titled “A Man Will Cheat If A Woman Doesn’t Understand These 8 Things” (Click Here to read) and as I read the article I asked myself where do these type of men hangout so I can stay FAR away from that place. I won’t address every point but there were a few that just really bothered me so here they are and my responses.

Just because I want to give your home girl hard p*** in the bathroom of a club doesn’t mean I will. Ladies if you have a pretty friend it’s only nature that a man would want to do her. He probably thinks damn I would do x y and z to her and put her pink fuzzy panties on my head and let her take pictures of me, but then again I would never do anything to lose my boo, because I love her.

If you truly “loved your boo” you would not have any reason to lust after her friend. Granted lust is a part of human nature, but come on don’t use that as an excuse. If you think about the act has already been committed in the heart so that is just as bad. This is a Maury/Jerry Springer situation waiting to happen

I will look at women on the internet, deal with it. God bless Rosa Acosta, Bria Myles, Kitty and the other video vixens. A woman should understand that this is the internet age, and women send sexy twitpics, facebook and myspace profile pics and all of that. As a man I am programmed to look at them and say things like Damn! Whoa! And OhMiGosh!

Who is your programmer? They need a smack to adjust the battery and wires in your back. Don’t use the internet as an excuse for this type of behavior. If any man does this blatantly in front of his girlfriend or not it is just disrespectful. I hate when break their necks to look at a female. Yes we are all beautiful, but come on, you’ve never seen a big butt? You’ve never seen breast? Stop acting like 14yr old boys. Don’t blame the internet age on getting twitpics…if it is known that you are in a relationship then you should not accept or open any twitpics or myspace messages because its obvious the skanky woman doesn’t have respect for your partner and by you making this excuse it shows that you don’t either.

I will give my boys cover from cheating, advice on how to cheat and be an excuse for them if they need me too. You got a few hoe friends too again you should understand… but I know you won’t, and I fully understand if you don’t like him, but we will still hit the strip club and go out for drinks. I will always love you.

I guess decency just went out of the window…If you will do it for him he will do it for you so why should I trust you? I know people are going to say that’s loyalty, but whenever someone tries to put me in a situation like that I say I don’t want to get involved. If you are doing your dirt don’t try to makek me an accomplice.

At this point I’m like this has got to be a joke until I got to the last point which I actually agree with…

I have no clue what you’re talking about unless you’re upfront and direct with me. – Women give too many hints and quite simply men don’t do hints we are direct and we beat around the bush when we don’t want to talk about a subject.

Sometimes, well most of the time, we do beat around the bush and never state our wants, needs, or concerns directly. Men are not mind readers and we cannot expect them to use their “psychic powers” to try to please us so ladies be upfront and state exactly how you feel and fellas try to listen.

His closing argument was pretty decent, but still 7 out of the 8 things were just ridiculous. Blogxilla states “

There are a million more things men need women to know, but hey… I can’t tell all y’all everything. Beside it’s also a man’s job to mold himself to his woman’s liking. We need to understand who we are involved with and treat them how they want to be treated. Even if that does mean changing some of our ways.

(sucks that I have to right this, but this is a general post and not intended to be taken as all men think this way… Just most of us)”

Visit www.blogxilla.com for more interesting articles

Ok I am no relationship guru but I had to share my thoughts on this subject. This post was inspired by a woman named Neenah from New Jersey who set out to find a husband in 52 weeks. She was not successful…smh. We have all been single at some point in our lives and I want to know if you feel it is difficult. Some people must have a companion at all times. Without a man or a woman they do not feel complete. Is that a problem? Why must people always be in a relationship? When do they have time for themselves? When do they allow themselves time to truly love themselves and learn who they really are?

Would you rather be in a negative relationship for the sake of having a relationship or would you rather wait until your ideal mate comes along & be happy? I think people who constantly need to be in a relationship settle for the first or second person that shows interest. They really do not have a connection, but for the sake of saying I have a girlfriend or a boyfriend that enter or stay in unhealthy relationships.

Many people in these types of relationships are very unhappy and afraid to be alone. They should really evaluate themselves and find the real problem. How are you being fulfilled in a relationship if you are not happy? How are you helping your mate improve himself or herself? What are your intentions for being in that relationship?

If you learn how to truly love yourself you will learn how to love others. You learn how to love yourself by understanding God’s love because his love is unconditional and perfect. Once you realize why and how God love’s you, your thoughts about yourself will change and how you love others will change alss. How you let others love you will change as well.

Neenah’s first mistake was trying to find her husband when she should let him find her. She went on about 40 dates in 52 weeks. That is excessive I think. Does she really know what she wants? Why the extreme attempt? Love will happen when you least expect it (so I’ve heard). When you stop looking that is when love will come. Focus on loving God and loving yourself. Take yourself out to see a movie. Treat yourself to lunch. Visit a museum or an art gallery. Do something that is pleasurable to you and you may bump into Mr. or Mrs. Right when you least expect it 🙂

For more on Neenah’s Journey for Love visit www.52weeks2findhim.com