1. Never yell unless there is a fire. HGB: Yelling does not solve the problem. He/she will just tune you out.
2. Your first romantic efforts are usually your tools for longevity never throw them away. HGB: Never let the “honeymoon end”
3. Always renovate the structure of your relationship nothing new can ever grow on old soil. HGB: Try new things together and explore new places. Your relationship and bond wil be stronger. Find new ways to stay in love (if that makes sense)
4. If you follow rule three you will remain in tact through any storm. HGB: Storms are only temporary so stick it out!
5. If one person is finance someone has to be management, each individual should respect the others job. HGB: We do not need too many chiefs, indians are needed too.
6. Sacrifice things that are in reason for the benefit of the relationship. HGB: Sacrifice is a major part of any relationship. Sometimes you have to give up something to please your partner and to prevent unnecessary arguments.
7. Give from your heart and never from your mouth for the heart has no mouth for speaking only actions for doing! HGB:Preach!
8. Listen to your partner don’t hear them! When you are truly listening you are not thinking of your rebuttal or contemplating your defense. HGB: “Too listen is an effor and just to hear has no merit. Ducks hear also” -Igor Stravinsky. Listen to your partner and try to understand what he/she is saying! When you do not listen that causes a break down in communication and eventually the relationship.
9. Want for your partner what you would want for yourself. HGB: If you want the best for yourself, want the best for your partner, you are not in a relationship to upstage each other.
10. Saying that you are working on your bad habits is just an excuse for delaying the change. The cure is simple change the bad habit. HGB: Actions speak louder than words. Refer back to the posts on bad habits http://hergoodybag.com/motivation-monday 
11. Keep the arguments clean and the sex dirty. HGB: Ummmmmmmm *blank stare*
12. Communication is key Democritus Of Abdera said it best: “To do all the talking and not willing to listen is a form of greed.” HGB: Communication is the basis of every relationship. With communication there is no relationship. That goes for lovers, family members, friends, and even co-workers. If you communicate effectively and not with the intentions of just doing what’s right for you, many problems can be and will be avoided.

So for all of you love birds out there, I hope this helps you and your love life.

-Stay SWEET!

“Classically, people see this is a barrier gesture that repels people,” James says. There are two different versions, each with its own meaning. “If your arms are folded in a self-hug, so that your hands touch your rib cage, it can imply that you’re feeling insecure or bored,” she says. “If your arms are folded, so that your hands are on your biceps, you’re telling him that you’re not interested in talking.”

HGB: I don’t think I have ever seen someone standing in one place with their arms folded like they are hugging themselves. that just doesn’t seem normal or natural and it feels a little uncomfortable (yes I just tried it lol…don’t judge me). I do know that when your arms are folded while you are speaking to someone it does show lack of interest, disrespect, or even abuse of power (superiority, I’m better than you, I’m the boss type of power) so ladies be mindful of this.

Signal #8 Steady Eye Contact

“Giving him 100-percent eye contact when he’s talking, while also nodding to show that you’re listening, tells him that you value what he has to say,” James says. But you should look away briefly when you’re talking. “Too much prolonged eye contact when you speak can look intimidating or even dishonest.”

HGB: I think making eye contact with anyone in general shows a sign of confidence and respect. Sometimes a person’s eyes can help you better understand what they are saying because you sometimes feel connected. “The eyes are the windows to the soul.”

So Ladies, when you first meet a guy, make sure you pay attention to your body language. You do not want to give off the wrong message.

(Secret Signals via Glamour.com)

Signal #4 When You Look Away When Hugging or Embracing a Man

If you look around the room, at the door or even at another guy when you say hello to a man, it tells him that you’re not that into him, says James. “You may even be on the lookout for someone else,” she adds.

HGB: this is a little tricky because sometimes, I would be involved in another conversation, but that does not mean I’m not interested. If I wasn’t interested, I wouldn’t let you touch me, but if we are friends and I’m not interested it would not be a very long embrace. That’s sending mixed messages. So I’ll save us both the trouble and just shake my hand lol

Signal #5

“Making subtle tweaks to mirror his movements shows him that you two are on the same page,” says James. Mirroring his movements may sound awkward or too obvious, but something as subtle as holding your drink at the same height as his is all it takes.

HGB: If you purposely mirror his actions, you may scare him off. Only kids like to play shadow or copy cat…reminds me of my 2yr old niece who says “Auntie, I’m following yooouuu” and she literally mimicks everything that I do. For a two year-old it is cute, but not for an adult. Be careful with this one, unless it just happens naturally like you saying/thinking the same thing, then ok, but other that no!

Signal #6

“If you smile subtly—without showing your teeth—while your eyes are slightly narrowed, you’re telling a guy that you want to get to know him better,” James says. This signal is best used when you first meet someone.

HGB: I can just see someone just taking this information and doing the extreme. Be careful with this smile, do you guys remember the episode of Full House when DJ told Stephanie to do the little coy/half smile and she ended up looking really creepy lol… *classic episode* so be careful!

As you all may know, we communicate in many ways, not just through speaking. Our body language plays a major role in how people perceive us, and the signals we send through our body language can often be misunderstood. So I’m going to let you know what guys think based on the signals of your body language.

Signal #1 Eye Contact

This is the most powerful weapon in your body-language-flirting arsenal, says Judi James, author of The Body Language Rules: A Savvy Guide to Understanding Who’s Flirting, Who’s Faking, and Who’s Really Interested.”If you hold his gaze for just a half second longer than the usual split-second gaze, and then you look down and back at him, it tells the guy that you’ve considered him and you like what you see,” James says.

HGB: this happens all of the time. As soon as I look at a guy, he thinks that I want him. I look down and I look back at him, out of habit or maybe he is cute, but if I’m interested I would smile, if I don’t then I’m thinking #ontothenextone lol. I was on the train one evening, and I happened to make eye contact with this guy trying to see what stop we were at. He thought that was his invitation to start a conversaiton. I was reading The Farming of Bones by Edwidge Danticat (great story) and he interrupted me and asked what was the book about. I looked at him and just saw all gold teeth and he just looked stale. I think my face may have looked like the bbm *sick face* Long story short, he still tried to talke to me and it didn’t work I was just nodding my head but really just reading my book. So now I wear shades on the train….lol…just kidding

Signal #2 Twirling your hair or fixing your clothes

We do this when we’re aware that we’re being watched and we want to make sure we look our best, James says. Grooming gestures like these let him know that you’ve noticed he has checked you out.

HGB: I have a bad habit of playing with my hair when I am bored. In meetings I just twirl my hair and it is a horrible habit that I need to break ASAP! I also twirl my hair when I’m a little nervous smh

Signal #3 Gently touching his arm

This is a boundary-testing touch. “Men see this as the first gesture to sex,” James says. “You are inviting him to reciprocate and touch you in a similar way.”

This is a boundary-testing touch. “Men see this as the first gesture to sex,” James says. “You are inviting him to reciprocate and touch you in a similar way.”

HGB: As long as he tries to touch my arm or my hand, that’s fine, but please leave my thighs, waist, or the small of my back alone! You’re cool but not that cool…sorry